Monday, December 6, 2010

HARD TIMES

i rushed
along the street
i saw her briefly there
she held a sign with some design
hard times

i met
her next downtown
her face marked by a frown
her tattoo had become the sign
hard times

i caught
a taxi bound
uptown my final stretch
what meant this tattood haunting wretch
hard times

she's there
plaza entrance
barring further progress
one last meeting i must address
hard times

in one
movement she came
her arm outstretched   the knife
glinted bright with the ache of strife
hard times

23 comments:

  1. You really know how to tell a story, poetry style. excellent...lots of action, imagery, and emotion, well done.

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  2. Like the form this one took, the visual of the style and the flow that came with. An interesting story - I've gone back, and perhaps I'm trying too hard to attach more meaning to certain images, but nonetheless...good description, interesting recurrence of encounter. A powerful end. Hard times indeed.

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  3. powerful imagery.
    Thanks for linking up with potluck poetry.
    Happy Tuesday!

    A+

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  4. hard times- beautifully written, stylish! mine's here- http://fiveloaf.wordpress.com/2010/01/15/head/

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  5. The cadence - so light - belied the harshness of the subject matter. I enjoyed this poem very much.

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  6. MG...
    You got it goin on Brother.
    Loved your One Shot, great flow..
    You need to think about Friday Flash 55, you'd be GREAT at that little writing Bontemps.

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  7. nice...you see here everywhere...hard times are hard to escpape these days...

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  8. Great rhythm - I read this out loud and the words have a beautiful prosody

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  9. Glad to have visitors who liked the piece. Seems like for some it's always hard times. Thank you for the comments.

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  10. A thrill and chill from that one. Hard times, indeed. :) Nicely done, and thanks for sharing.

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  11. Nice flow and interesting read.

    Anita.

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  12. hard luck indeed. Great poem!

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  13. So you tell about life.. and you tell it well.. been here, there, everywhere..

    really good poem..

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  14. Poetic Noir - and I like it. Well told, and well done.

    I'm a fan of Hopper,too.

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  15. That's not nice! (LOL!)

    Interesting One Shot!

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  16. Intriguing themes, and I like the noir tone of your work.

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  17. This went dark piece went full circle
    excellent flow accompanied by an excellent write

    thanks for sharing with One Shot - a treat

    Moondustwriter

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  18. Thank you Moondustwriter and the One Stop people for providing this place to share. Much appreciated.

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  19. exellent imagery and a story told quite well... an interesting, memorable and enjoyable read.

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  20. Excellent, striking pictures you paint here, with a masterful theme-centric refrain.

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  21. excellent cinquain stanzas - in fact a 'crown cinquain', no? (There being five). I write them also.

    Good stuff

    Luke @ WordSalad

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  22. Good catch there Luke. I liked the tidiness of the set! Not perfectly iambic but close enough.

    Thanks everyone else for your comments. Wanted to keep it sharp and try for a thrill.

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